Saturday, January 29, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
For Every Former Hot Child
Friday, January 21, 2011
10:05 PM Ohhh, I'm not sure how to write this...
I moved to New York a year ago this past weekend. Today would have been my last day as a page. I feel like I should be feeling something definitive about this anniversary, but I just feel a lot of things: a little sad, a little sentimental, a little awestruck... but mostly kind of tired with an achy back. Is that how you know you're a grown up? When the only feeling you can focus on is which body part is aching? Maybe I have come full circle.
Anyway, the past year has been a big one for me. When I think back on where I was a year ago and where I am now... it's kind of awesome. I just keep thinking, It all worked out. And it didn't just work out -- it far exceeded my expectations.
I'm an adult now, and I actually feel like an adult. I have a job. I'm financially independent. I live in my own apartment in New York City. I pay bills. I fix leaky toilets. I kill roaches like it's a second job. I take pilates classes and go grocery shopping. I do work I'm proud of. I wear pencil skirts and heels for Christ's Sake!
And, as is usually the case, I'm still figuring it all out. Going home to CT is still a giant relief - not just because I get to see my family, but because it means for one weekend every several weeks I get to take a break from being an adult. I get to eat free food from a kitchen that actually has something other than crackers and diet Coke. I get to sleep in a room where I'm not woken up by drunk people screaming in the street. I get to shower in a bathroom that is huge and beautiful and always has hot water. It's a vacation every time I'm home.
But I'm getting pretty good at the adult thing. And while I still may eat salad from a mug to avoid washing a bowl and only vacuum when the hair balls on the carpet become visible from the next room, I take a lot of pride in everything I've done.
As far as writing goes, I think I'm going to stop blogging for a while. As you've noticed, my posts have become more infrequent and less inspired. It's not that I don't enjoy writing about my life anymore -- it's just that I've been out living it. And I'm finding that the stuff I do want to write about probably shouldn't be posted on a blog (I do have limits, believe it or not). I think I may eventually start a Tumblr, a la Little Gman. That way I can post my random thoughts and write when I feel like it. We'll see...
I'll leave you with one final story, for now... Last weekend, the anniversary of my own Great Move, I was home in Gbury because I got Monday off. Mom dropped me off at the train station Monday afternoon, and after waiting for a half hour, I found out my train had been delayed 2 hours. I was told my best bet was to buy a bus ticket to NYC instead, so, much to my dismay, that's what I did. As I stood with all of my bags in the freezing cold in a line of 50 other impatient travelers, a guy walked by me carrying a Whole Foods paper bag. Just as he passed, the bottom of the bag gave out. A large glass bottle broke and a liter of liquid gushed onto the cement, puddling around my feet.
It was about 5 seconds later, when the smell hit me, that I realized what the liquid was. And I had to laugh because the scene was perfectly symbolic of my life right now...
In transition, New York-bound, weighed down, waiting, laughing...
...and standing in a pool of tequila.
Love always,
La Viajera
10:05 PM Ohhh, I'm not sure how to write this...
I moved to New York a year ago this past weekend. Today would have been my last day as a page. I feel like I should be feeling something definitive about this anniversary, but I just feel a lot of things: a little sad, a little sentimental, a little awestruck... but mostly kind of tired with an achy back. Is that how you know you're a grown up? When the only feeling you can focus on is which body part is aching? Maybe I have come full circle.
Anyway, the past year has been a big one for me. When I think back on where I was a year ago and where I am now... it's kind of awesome. I just keep thinking, It all worked out. And it didn't just work out -- it far exceeded my expectations.
I'm an adult now, and I actually feel like an adult. I have a job. I'm financially independent. I live in my own apartment in New York City. I pay bills. I fix leaky toilets. I kill roaches like it's a second job. I take pilates classes and go grocery shopping. I do work I'm proud of. I wear pencil skirts and heels for Christ's Sake!
And, as is usually the case, I'm still figuring it all out. Going home to CT is still a giant relief - not just because I get to see my family, but because it means for one weekend every several weeks I get to take a break from being an adult. I get to eat free food from a kitchen that actually has something other than crackers and diet Coke. I get to sleep in a room where I'm not woken up by drunk people screaming in the street. I get to shower in a bathroom that is huge and beautiful and always has hot water. It's a vacation every time I'm home.
But I'm getting pretty good at the adult thing. And while I still may eat salad from a mug to avoid washing a bowl and only vacuum when the hair balls on the carpet become visible from the next room, I take a lot of pride in everything I've done.
As far as writing goes, I think I'm going to stop blogging for a while. As you've noticed, my posts have become more infrequent and less inspired. It's not that I don't enjoy writing about my life anymore -- it's just that I've been out living it. And I'm finding that the stuff I do want to write about probably shouldn't be posted on a blog (I do have limits, believe it or not). I think I may eventually start a Tumblr, a la Little Gman. That way I can post my random thoughts and write when I feel like it. We'll see...
I'll leave you with one final story, for now... Last weekend, the anniversary of my own Great Move, I was home in Gbury because I got Monday off. Mom dropped me off at the train station Monday afternoon, and after waiting for a half hour, I found out my train had been delayed 2 hours. I was told my best bet was to buy a bus ticket to NYC instead, so, much to my dismay, that's what I did. As I stood with all of my bags in the freezing cold in a line of 50 other impatient travelers, a guy walked by me carrying a Whole Foods paper bag. Just as he passed, the bottom of the bag gave out. A large glass bottle broke and a liter of liquid gushed onto the cement, puddling around my feet.
It was about 5 seconds later, when the smell hit me, that I realized what the liquid was. And I had to laugh because the scene was perfectly symbolic of my life right now...
In transition, New York-bound, weighed down, waiting, laughing...
...and standing in a pool of tequila.
Love always,
La Viajera
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Conversations with My Mother
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
7:52 PM Ok, maybe my side isn't so flattering...
Via text one bright Saturday morning...
Mom (8:15:15 AM): U were at happy hour for like 12 hours ;)
T (8:57:19 AM): I hooked up with [TEXT REMOVED TO PROTECT, UH, ME]
Mom (8:58:16 AM): Hmmm - kissing a cute guy isn't a bad night ;)
T (8:59:22 AM): Hahaha yeah it was pretty great. Kill me tho
Mom (8:59:51 AM): Why kill u?
T (9:00:45 AM): Ha because I'm hungover and I made out with [TEXT REMOVED...AGAIN]
Mom (9:03:13 AM): U had fun last night so that is good. Take some Tylenol, drink a big glass of water and go back to sleep - u only slept 4 hours. ...Que será será (not sure how to spell that).
T (9:03:57 AM): Ahhh you're the best mom ever
Love,
Tara
7:52 PM Ok, maybe my side isn't so flattering...
Via text one bright Saturday morning...
Mom (8:15:15 AM): U were at happy hour for like 12 hours ;)
T (8:57:19 AM): I hooked up with [TEXT REMOVED TO PROTECT, UH, ME]
Mom (8:58:16 AM): Hmmm - kissing a cute guy isn't a bad night ;)
T (8:59:22 AM): Hahaha yeah it was pretty great. Kill me tho
Mom (8:59:51 AM): Why kill u?
T (9:00:45 AM): Ha because I'm hungover and I made out with [TEXT REMOVED...AGAIN]
Mom (9:03:13 AM): U had fun last night so that is good. Take some Tylenol, drink a big glass of water and go back to sleep - u only slept 4 hours. ...Que será será (not sure how to spell that).
T (9:03:57 AM): Ahhh you're the best mom ever
Love,
Tara
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Riding Trains With Strangers
Saturday, December 4, 2010
10:25 PM This is my life.
Let me tell you about the train ride home yesterday. So, it's Friday evening. I get out of work around six and elbow my way through the mobs of people surrounding Rockefeller Plaza. It's an interesting mix of awestruck tourists trying to get to the tree and angry New Yorkers trying to get home from work. I don't think I've heard the words "Jesus Christ" uttered so many times in such a short span of time.
So, I get to Penn Station and I'm standing by the giant Departure board, waiting for my gate to be announced. While impatiently shifting my bags I get irrationally angry as I watch a girl my age coming up the escalator holding a bag of popcorn. Instead of using her other free hand to eat the popcorn, she dips her tongue into the bag and happily munches away. This evokes an anger in me I can't fully describe, but I feel a little better imagining myself punching the bag out of her hands. Why so angry? It's not nice or even logical, but maybe it's because I'm breathless and achy and stressed and there she is, floating up the escalator, tonguing her popcorn.
Anyway, the gate gets listed and I elbow my way through the line and get on the train. I had forgotten my iPod at home the weekend before, so I was especially psyched to nab a seat in the "Quiet Car." I was looking forward to peace and quiet, especially since I didn't have music to distract me or to drown out noise.
Alas, just as the train is about to leave, I notice a middle-aged man hovering near my seat. Actually, that's not true. I smelled stale smoke, and then I realized a middle-aged man was hovering near my seat. "Can I sit here?" he smiled, through yellow teeth. "Sure," I shrugged, turning back to my book.
Even looking back now, I can't figure out what possessed this man to talk to me. In fact, I'm not sure what possesses any man to talk to me when I don't want to be talked to, because I think I make my body language pretty clear. I had my head buried in a book and I had my body shifted away from him (and the stench of smoke) and toward the window. Oh, and did I mention the book I was reading was "Chastened"? Like, if the fact that I'm sitting alone on a train reading a book doesn't scream "Hey Men! Don't talk to me!" the fact that the book I'm reading says "CHASTENED" in big black letters across the front should be enough to send any sane man running. But alas, I have always had a knack for attracting the crazies...
Announcer: (static) ...Ladies and Gentleman, this is the 6:43 train 148 regional train to Springfield, Massachusetts...
Creeper: (takes a deep breath, holds it for a moment) Say, do you know if this train is going to Springfield?
T: (looks up from her book) I think so.
T turns back to her book.
2 minutes later...
Creeper: So, are you from Manhattan?
T: (half looks up) No, I'm not.
The Creeper pauses, takes a deep breath and holds it again. T braces herself.
Creeper: Well, I'm from Springfield.
T nods, not looking up from her book.
1 minute later...
Creeper: I wonder why people from Connecticut don't have accents. Like in Massachusetts, where I'm from people say, "I'm going to pahk the cah," but people in Connecticut don't sound like that.
T: (looks at the Creeper, mostly to be sure this is actually happening) Yeah, I don't know.
8 minutes later...
The Creeper stands up.
Creeper: Would you mind watching my bag for me?
T: Sure.
15 minutes later the Creeper returns, Bloody Mary in hand. He sits down and slurps loudly.
Creeper: You know, I gotta tell ya, these drinks are pretty good.
T: (no longer bothering to look up) That's good.
Creeper: Would you like one?
T: Nope, I'm all set.
The Creeper slurps loudly.
15 minutes later the Creeper stands up and leaves again. He returns five minutes later with another Bloody Mary. He sits down heavily.
Creeper: Did you know they call this the 'Quiet Car'? I'm going to call it the 'Party Car.'
T: (raises an eyebrow) Are you allowed to do that?
T braces herself. In her impulse to go to sarcasm she has accidentally asked the Creeper a question. Fortunately he is too busy gulping his Bloody Mary to answer.
5 minutes later...
Creeper: I bet you're in school will all that reading you're doing.
T: I do like reading.
NOTE: T dodges the question about college on purpose. Talking about college or anything related to college is dangerous. Much like marijuana is considered a gateway drug to the use of other more dangerous drugs, talking about college can lead to a plethora of more dangerous topics of conversation. Questions like where you went, what you majored in, and how you liked it can go on forever, quickly leaving you helpless and wondering at what point in the conversation you lost control.
10 minutes later...
Creeper: May I ask how many more years of school you have?
T: (exasperated) I've graduated.
Creeper: Oh wow! I bet you were a business major.
T: (turning a page in her book) Nope.
Creeper: Sorry?
T: (she looks at him and enunciates) I wasn't a business major.
1 minute later...
Creeper: Well, I was a psychology major. I chose it because I'm so mentally screwed up, I thought it would help me figure some stuff out. But then I realized my professors were even more screwed up than I was!
T: That's good you learned something.
T is seriously considering pretending to fall asleep at this point, except she's sort of afraid he'll sit there and watch her. Then something miraculous happens...
Creeper: I just got a promotion at work and they want me t-
The woman sitting in front of T and the Creeper turns around.
Woman: (to the Creeper) Excuse me, would you mind keeping it down?
Creeper: I'm so sorry.
T smirks into her book.
Not five minutes later, the Creeper stands up, gathers his things, bids T farewell and moves into a different car.
To his credit, he did so quietly.
Love,
Tara
10:25 PM This is my life.
Let me tell you about the train ride home yesterday. So, it's Friday evening. I get out of work around six and elbow my way through the mobs of people surrounding Rockefeller Plaza. It's an interesting mix of awestruck tourists trying to get to the tree and angry New Yorkers trying to get home from work. I don't think I've heard the words "Jesus Christ" uttered so many times in such a short span of time.
So, I get to Penn Station and I'm standing by the giant Departure board, waiting for my gate to be announced. While impatiently shifting my bags I get irrationally angry as I watch a girl my age coming up the escalator holding a bag of popcorn. Instead of using her other free hand to eat the popcorn, she dips her tongue into the bag and happily munches away. This evokes an anger in me I can't fully describe, but I feel a little better imagining myself punching the bag out of her hands. Why so angry? It's not nice or even logical, but maybe it's because I'm breathless and achy and stressed and there she is, floating up the escalator, tonguing her popcorn.
Anyway, the gate gets listed and I elbow my way through the line and get on the train. I had forgotten my iPod at home the weekend before, so I was especially psyched to nab a seat in the "Quiet Car." I was looking forward to peace and quiet, especially since I didn't have music to distract me or to drown out noise.
Alas, just as the train is about to leave, I notice a middle-aged man hovering near my seat. Actually, that's not true. I smelled stale smoke, and then I realized a middle-aged man was hovering near my seat. "Can I sit here?" he smiled, through yellow teeth. "Sure," I shrugged, turning back to my book.
Even looking back now, I can't figure out what possessed this man to talk to me. In fact, I'm not sure what possesses any man to talk to me when I don't want to be talked to, because I think I make my body language pretty clear. I had my head buried in a book and I had my body shifted away from him (and the stench of smoke) and toward the window. Oh, and did I mention the book I was reading was "Chastened"? Like, if the fact that I'm sitting alone on a train reading a book doesn't scream "Hey Men! Don't talk to me!" the fact that the book I'm reading says "CHASTENED" in big black letters across the front should be enough to send any sane man running. But alas, I have always had a knack for attracting the crazies...
Announcer: (static) ...Ladies and Gentleman, this is the 6:43 train 148 regional train to Springfield, Massachusetts...
Creeper: (takes a deep breath, holds it for a moment) Say, do you know if this train is going to Springfield?
T: (looks up from her book) I think so.
T turns back to her book.
2 minutes later...
Creeper: So, are you from Manhattan?
T: (half looks up) No, I'm not.
The Creeper pauses, takes a deep breath and holds it again. T braces herself.
Creeper: Well, I'm from Springfield.
T nods, not looking up from her book.
1 minute later...
Creeper: I wonder why people from Connecticut don't have accents. Like in Massachusetts, where I'm from people say, "I'm going to pahk the cah," but people in Connecticut don't sound like that.
T: (looks at the Creeper, mostly to be sure this is actually happening) Yeah, I don't know.
8 minutes later...
The Creeper stands up.
Creeper: Would you mind watching my bag for me?
T: Sure.
15 minutes later the Creeper returns, Bloody Mary in hand. He sits down and slurps loudly.
Creeper: You know, I gotta tell ya, these drinks are pretty good.
T: (no longer bothering to look up) That's good.
Creeper: Would you like one?
T: Nope, I'm all set.
The Creeper slurps loudly.
15 minutes later the Creeper stands up and leaves again. He returns five minutes later with another Bloody Mary. He sits down heavily.
Creeper: Did you know they call this the 'Quiet Car'? I'm going to call it the 'Party Car.'
T: (raises an eyebrow) Are you allowed to do that?
T braces herself. In her impulse to go to sarcasm she has accidentally asked the Creeper a question. Fortunately he is too busy gulping his Bloody Mary to answer.
5 minutes later...
Creeper: I bet you're in school will all that reading you're doing.
T: I do like reading.
NOTE: T dodges the question about college on purpose. Talking about college or anything related to college is dangerous. Much like marijuana is considered a gateway drug to the use of other more dangerous drugs, talking about college can lead to a plethora of more dangerous topics of conversation. Questions like where you went, what you majored in, and how you liked it can go on forever, quickly leaving you helpless and wondering at what point in the conversation you lost control.
10 minutes later...
Creeper: May I ask how many more years of school you have?
T: (exasperated) I've graduated.
Creeper: Oh wow! I bet you were a business major.
T: (turning a page in her book) Nope.
Creeper: Sorry?
T: (she looks at him and enunciates) I wasn't a business major.
1 minute later...
Creeper: Well, I was a psychology major. I chose it because I'm so mentally screwed up, I thought it would help me figure some stuff out. But then I realized my professors were even more screwed up than I was!
T: That's good you learned something.
T is seriously considering pretending to fall asleep at this point, except she's sort of afraid he'll sit there and watch her. Then something miraculous happens...
Creeper: I just got a promotion at work and they want me t-
The woman sitting in front of T and the Creeper turns around.
Woman: (to the Creeper) Excuse me, would you mind keeping it down?
Creeper: I'm so sorry.
T smirks into her book.
Not five minutes later, the Creeper stands up, gathers his things, bids T farewell and moves into a different car.
To his credit, he did so quietly.
Love,
Tara
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Exclamation Point!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
9:03 PM This week I'm thankful for...
This past weekend while I was home in CT, I went shopping with my mom and she bought me...wait for it... a brand new Vera Bradley planner for 2011! It's beautiful and pink with lots of white swirly designs on it and has everything I need to take my OCD to whole new levels.
One thing I love about the planner is at the end of each week it poses a sort of fill in the blank. Written at the bottom of the page is something like "This week I'm thankful for..." and then you fill it whatever you like. As I transfer notes and important dates from my old planner to my new planner, I thought it might be interesting to look at all of my answers from the past year and a half. I haven't cheated and looked ahead yet. I'm a little scared...
Week 31: This week I'm thankful for... my friends!
Week 32: This week I laughed when... I watched Kaitlyn's play!
Week 33: The best thing that happened this week was... when I got an email from NBC asking me to interview for a job!
Week 34: This week I smiled when... I drove with Greg up to Boston to see Ally, Kelly + Szebs.
Week 35: This week I'm thankful for... my supportive, patient family.
Week 36: This week I laughed when... Christina called me!
Week 37: The best thing that happened this week was... getting together with Ally, A and Steph at Maxamore.
Week 38: This week I smiled when... I hear Candace Bushnell speak.
Week 39: This week I'm thankful for... my mom.
Week 40: This week I laughed when... I went to Ang's with Karen.
Week 41: The best thing that happened this week was... when * messaged me on Facebook :)
Week 42: This week I smiled when... * and I texted for five hours on Thursday :)
Week 43: This week I'm thankful for... the girls of 426 :)
Week 44: This week I laughed when... * was texting me on Wednesday.
Week 45: The best thing that happened this week was... getting out of a relationship that was going no where... even though it was hard!
Week 46: This week I smiled when... my Welcome Packet from NBC came :)
Week 47: This week I'm thankful for... the health of my friends and family.
Week 48: This week I laughed when... I spent time with good friends at South Tavern Wednesday night.
Week 49: The best thing that happened this week was... (possibly) finding a cool, normal roommate for NYC!
Week 50: This week I smiled when... I got to see everyone in COM :)
Week 51: This week I'm thankful for... my dad for always helping me out :)
Week 52: This week I laughed when... I saw Kaylee on Christmas.
Week 1: The best thing that happened this week was... laying by the pool in Key West.
Week 2: This week I smiled when... I told my family i got my start date from NBC.
Week 3: This week I'm thankful for... my dad, who is always there for me.
Week 4: This week I laughed when... I got to sit in the audience for Late Night With Jimmy Fallon!
Week 5: The best thing that happened this week was... getting to go home!
Week 6: This week I smiled when... I went out with everyone to the mentor/mentee dinner.
Week 7: This week I'm thankful for... my will to persevere!
Week 8: This week I laughed when... I saw 'Up In The Air.'
Week 9: The best thing that happened this week was... winning the Page of the Month award!!!!!!
Week 10: This week I smiled when... I got the Corp Comm assignment.
Week 11: This week I'm thankful for... days off!
Week 12: This week I laughed when... I went to Perdition with the pages Saturday night.
Week 13: The best thing that happened this week was... going to Katie's birthday party with the pages.
Week 14: This week I smiled when... my cousins came over for Easter :)
Week 15: This week I'm thankful for... my page friends :)
Week 16: This week I laughed when... I went to the Brooklyn Brewery with the pages.
Week 17: The best thing that happened this week was... having an awesome dinner with Liz!
Week 18: This week I smiled when... we were at No Idea for my birthday :)
Week 19: This week I'm thankful for... my mom <3
Week 20: This week I laughed when... I was at the SNL season finale After, After with all my friends!
Week 21: The best thing that happened this week was... getting Saturday TC!
Week 22: This week I smiled when... Corp Comm threw me a goodbye lunch!
Week 24: This week I laughed when... I was at the page council meeting.
Week 25: The best thing that happened this week was... getting to spend 3 days at home!
Week 26: This week I smiled when... * brought me strawberries.
Week 27: This week I'm thankful for... chick flicks :)
Week 28: This week I laughed when... I hung out with Arianna.
Week 29: The best thing that happened this week was... going to Stone Harbor with my family!
Week 30: This week I smiled when... I went to brunch with Mike and Kayla.
Week 31: This week I'm thankful for... good books!
Week 32: This week I laughed when... I saw Kaitlyn's play.
Week 33: The best thing that happened this week was... going on the Sports Marketing outing!
Week 34: This week I smiled when I found out Stephen and Rebecca are having a baby!
Week 35: This week I'm thankful for... my fantastic assignment :)
Week 36: This week I laughed when... I was at Grandma's.
Week 37: The best thing that happened this week was... having Steph come and visit!
Week 38 : This week I smiled when... we successfully threw a surprise party for Mom and Dad's 25th wedding anniversary!
Week 39: This week I'm thankful for... my family.
Week 40: This week I laughed when... I was watching 'The Office' at the gym.
Week 41: The best thing that happened this week was... working SNL and the epic After parties!
Week 42: This week I smiled when... I hung out with Greg and Cabral :)
Week 43: This week I'm thankful for... weekends!
Week 44: This week I laughed when... I went to dinner with everyone after the rally!
Week 45: The best thing that happened this week was... having a great weekend!
* names have been deleted to protect the stupid and innocent (namely me)
Now, I realize this is probably interesting to only me, but the lesson here?
1.) I use a lot of exclamation points.
2.) I use a lot of emoticons... even when I'm not typing.
3.) I've had a pretty great year and a half.
4.) I have a lot more to look forward to (exclamation point!)
Love,
Tara
9:03 PM This week I'm thankful for...
This past weekend while I was home in CT, I went shopping with my mom and she bought me...wait for it... a brand new Vera Bradley planner for 2011! It's beautiful and pink with lots of white swirly designs on it and has everything I need to take my OCD to whole new levels.
One thing I love about the planner is at the end of each week it poses a sort of fill in the blank. Written at the bottom of the page is something like "This week I'm thankful for..." and then you fill it whatever you like. As I transfer notes and important dates from my old planner to my new planner, I thought it might be interesting to look at all of my answers from the past year and a half. I haven't cheated and looked ahead yet. I'm a little scared...
Week 31: This week I'm thankful for... my friends!
Week 32: This week I laughed when... I watched Kaitlyn's play!
Week 33: The best thing that happened this week was... when I got an email from NBC asking me to interview for a job!
Week 34: This week I smiled when... I drove with Greg up to Boston to see Ally, Kelly + Szebs.
Week 35: This week I'm thankful for... my supportive, patient family.
Week 36: This week I laughed when... Christina called me!
Week 37: The best thing that happened this week was... getting together with Ally, A and Steph at Maxamore.
Week 38: This week I smiled when... I hear Candace Bushnell speak.
Week 39: This week I'm thankful for... my mom.
Week 40: This week I laughed when... I went to Ang's with Karen.
Week 41: The best thing that happened this week was... when * messaged me on Facebook :)
Week 42: This week I smiled when... * and I texted for five hours on Thursday :)
Week 43: This week I'm thankful for... the girls of 426 :)
Week 44: This week I laughed when... * was texting me on Wednesday.
Week 45: The best thing that happened this week was... getting out of a relationship that was going no where... even though it was hard!
Week 46: This week I smiled when... my Welcome Packet from NBC came :)
Week 47: This week I'm thankful for... the health of my friends and family.
Week 48: This week I laughed when... I spent time with good friends at South Tavern Wednesday night.
Week 49: The best thing that happened this week was... (possibly) finding a cool, normal roommate for NYC!
Week 50: This week I smiled when... I got to see everyone in COM :)
Week 51: This week I'm thankful for... my dad for always helping me out :)
Week 52: This week I laughed when... I saw Kaylee on Christmas.
Week 1: The best thing that happened this week was... laying by the pool in Key West.
Week 2: This week I smiled when... I told my family i got my start date from NBC.
Week 3: This week I'm thankful for... my dad, who is always there for me.
Week 4: This week I laughed when... I got to sit in the audience for Late Night With Jimmy Fallon!
Week 5: The best thing that happened this week was... getting to go home!
Week 6: This week I smiled when... I went out with everyone to the mentor/mentee dinner.
Week 7: This week I'm thankful for... my will to persevere!
Week 8: This week I laughed when... I saw 'Up In The Air.'
Week 9: The best thing that happened this week was... winning the Page of the Month award!!!!!!
Week 10: This week I smiled when... I got the Corp Comm assignment.
Week 11: This week I'm thankful for... days off!
Week 12: This week I laughed when... I went to Perdition with the pages Saturday night.
Week 13: The best thing that happened this week was... going to Katie's birthday party with the pages.
Week 14: This week I smiled when... my cousins came over for Easter :)
Week 15: This week I'm thankful for... my page friends :)
Week 16: This week I laughed when... I went to the Brooklyn Brewery with the pages.
Week 17: The best thing that happened this week was... having an awesome dinner with Liz!
Week 18: This week I smiled when... we were at No Idea for my birthday :)
Week 19: This week I'm thankful for... my mom <3
Week 20: This week I laughed when... I was at the SNL season finale After, After with all my friends!
Week 21: The best thing that happened this week was... getting Saturday TC!
Week 22: This week I smiled when... Corp Comm threw me a goodbye lunch!
Week 24: This week I laughed when... I was at the page council meeting.
Week 25: The best thing that happened this week was... getting to spend 3 days at home!
Week 26: This week I smiled when... * brought me strawberries.
Week 27: This week I'm thankful for... chick flicks :)
Week 28: This week I laughed when... I hung out with Arianna.
Week 29: The best thing that happened this week was... going to Stone Harbor with my family!
Week 30: This week I smiled when... I went to brunch with Mike and Kayla.
Week 31: This week I'm thankful for... good books!
Week 32: This week I laughed when... I saw Kaitlyn's play.
Week 33: The best thing that happened this week was... going on the Sports Marketing outing!
Week 34: This week I smiled when I found out Stephen and Rebecca are having a baby!
Week 35: This week I'm thankful for... my fantastic assignment :)
Week 36: This week I laughed when... I was at Grandma's.
Week 37: The best thing that happened this week was... having Steph come and visit!
Week 38 : This week I smiled when... we successfully threw a surprise party for Mom and Dad's 25th wedding anniversary!
Week 39: This week I'm thankful for... my family.
Week 40: This week I laughed when... I was watching 'The Office' at the gym.
Week 41: The best thing that happened this week was... working SNL and the epic After parties!
Week 42: This week I smiled when... I hung out with Greg and Cabral :)
Week 43: This week I'm thankful for... weekends!
Week 44: This week I laughed when... I went to dinner with everyone after the rally!
Week 45: The best thing that happened this week was... having a great weekend!
* names have been deleted to protect the stupid and innocent (namely me)
Now, I realize this is probably interesting to only me, but the lesson here?
1.) I use a lot of exclamation points.
2.) I use a lot of emoticons... even when I'm not typing.
3.) I've had a pretty great year and a half.
4.) I have a lot more to look forward to (exclamation point!)
Love,
Tara
Monday, November 15, 2010
It's Not You, It's Me.
Monday, November 15, 2010
8:56 PM ...and that includes you.
As I near the end of my month-long eHarm experiment, I've been trying to think about what my take-away will be. What's the moral of the story? The message, the theme, the reason? So far, the main thing I've realized is this: If over 200 guys are interested in you and want to get to know you and maybe start a relationship with you, and you can't find ONE that you would consider dating? Honey, it's not them - it's YOU.
I realized this like a week ago, but I couldn't figure out WHY I didn't like any of these guys. What was wrong with me?? I don't come from a broken home. I have a great relationship with my father. I'm not secretly in love with an ex or pining after a male friend, so WHAT was my deal??
It wasn't until just now, as I was eating dinner in bed while watching 'The Office,' that it struck me. I saw the clip below, where Jim talks to Dwight about heartbreak, and started to tear up mid-chew.
I imagine we all deal with heartbreak at some time in our lives, and, now that I think about it, there are few greater personal tragedies than that one. My own personal heartbreak was years ago, but recently I've watched my sister go through it for the first time, and in trying to be of some sort of sisterly help to her, all those awful feelings have come rushing back.
I remember what it's like to feel helpless. To feel lost. To feel just so sad to your very core. To wonder if you will ever feel better, normal, and to know on some level that you probably won't for a very long time.
And while every chick-flick will tell you that love is worth all the heartbreak that came before it, I just can't bring myself to consider it right now.
I'm happy with they way things are. I'm enough.
I don't ever want to find myself crying in a stairwell again.
Love,
Tara
8:56 PM ...and that includes you.
As I near the end of my month-long eHarm experiment, I've been trying to think about what my take-away will be. What's the moral of the story? The message, the theme, the reason? So far, the main thing I've realized is this: If over 200 guys are interested in you and want to get to know you and maybe start a relationship with you, and you can't find ONE that you would consider dating? Honey, it's not them - it's YOU.
I realized this like a week ago, but I couldn't figure out WHY I didn't like any of these guys. What was wrong with me?? I don't come from a broken home. I have a great relationship with my father. I'm not secretly in love with an ex or pining after a male friend, so WHAT was my deal??
It wasn't until just now, as I was eating dinner in bed while watching 'The Office,' that it struck me. I saw the clip below, where Jim talks to Dwight about heartbreak, and started to tear up mid-chew.
I imagine we all deal with heartbreak at some time in our lives, and, now that I think about it, there are few greater personal tragedies than that one. My own personal heartbreak was years ago, but recently I've watched my sister go through it for the first time, and in trying to be of some sort of sisterly help to her, all those awful feelings have come rushing back.
I remember what it's like to feel helpless. To feel lost. To feel just so sad to your very core. To wonder if you will ever feel better, normal, and to know on some level that you probably won't for a very long time.
And while every chick-flick will tell you that love is worth all the heartbreak that came before it, I just can't bring myself to consider it right now.
I'm happy with they way things are. I'm enough.
I don't ever want to find myself crying in a stairwell again.
Love,
Tara
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Straight cash, homey.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
6:26 PM Are you ready for some football??
In honor of NFL Sunday (all I've done today is watch football), I thought I'd post a couple of football-related vids that make me smile.
(I know I'm supposed to hate him, but I can't help it. He's too badass. And he's on my fantasy football team...)
(First, I have loved this song since I was eight years old and heard it on 'The First Wives' Club.' Second, who doesn't love a girl in a jersey? Adding one women's Patriots jersey to my Christmas List...)
Love,
Tara
6:26 PM Are you ready for some football??
In honor of NFL Sunday (all I've done today is watch football), I thought I'd post a couple of football-related vids that make me smile.
(I know I'm supposed to hate him, but I can't help it. He's too badass. And he's on my fantasy football team...)
(First, I have loved this song since I was eight years old and heard it on 'The First Wives' Club.' Second, who doesn't love a girl in a jersey? Adding one women's Patriots jersey to my Christmas List...)
Love,
Tara
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Chastened
Thursday, November 4, 2010
10:01 PM Love your smile...
I'm turning into a slut. Seriously. I'm sorry to be crass, but I'm not sure how else to put it. I am a big eHarmony slut.
My tale is not an unusual one. I started as a naive, young girl who turned to the Internet to... well, to what? Find true love? Appease her curiosity? We'll never know for sure what prompted me to sign on to eHarmony that fateful night, but I did it, and now I can hardly recognize the woman I've become.
At first I didn't want to talk to anyone on eHarm. These men would send me their '5-Questions,' and I would ignore them. But slowly, I started to answer. If a guy looked nice (or normal) I would answer their multiple-choice questions. What's the harm? I thought to myself. I didn't know what I was getting myself into.
Because once you start turning tricks, er, I mean, answering questions, it's hard to stop. I liked the attention and I wanted more. I stopped discriminating so much. Pretty much if you were a guy and you asked me your 5-Questions I would answer. I had no limits. I was out of control.
Oh, the shame! It is only now, looking back, that I can see the error of my ways. The only way I feel I can make this right is by sharing some of the lessons I have learned. But will that be enough? I just don't know...
I could tell you about Stephen. Stephen seemed nice enough. He was tall, good-looking. He was a chef in New York City. He seemed to have a lot going for him. And he was a smooth-talker, that Stephen. He sent me his 5-Questions, and I answered. Then he sent me an Icebreaker. I didn't know what an Icebreaker was, but I learned a lot from Stephen. It was an eHarmony message that read, "Love your smile." Well, that got me smitten. Give a gal a compliment and that'll get you pretty far. It wasn't until we took things to the next stage, the "Must Haves/Can't Stands" stage that I noticed the red flag.
The "Must Haves/Can't Stands" stage is when you go through a list of attributes that eHarm puts together and you check off ten that your ideal partner must have and ten that they must not. "Must Haves" include everything from "Confidence" to "Good Hygiene" whereas "Can't Stands" are like "Racial Intolerance" and "Addictions" (imagine having to pick which one you "can't stand" more...). Well, after that Icebreaker I got bold and sent Stephen my lists. I was in too deep, playing fast and loose. There was no saving me now.
The red flag came when I received Stephen's list and saw that as his first choice for his "Must Haves" he had selected "Sexually Knowledgeable." The description for this attribute reads, "I must have someone who is mature and experienced as a potential sexual partner and is able to express himself/herself freely."
Now, don't get me wrong, sexual expression is all well and good but would I call myself "mature" and "experienced"?! Do I want to be with a guy who needs that?? Or is willing to put that on paper as one of the top ten things he MUST have??!? He could have chosen "Kind" or "Affectionate" or even "Passionate," but he had to go and choose "Sexually Knowledgeable."
Red. Flag.
But how could this be? Things with Stephen were going so well. And he did send me that sweet Icebreaker, after all. I went back to read the Icebreaker for reassurance. That's when I realized... he hadn't written that Icebreaker at all. He had merely selected it from a list of options eHarm gave him. There it was: "Love your smile" right between "Want to chat?" and "I think we have a lot in common." I was devastated.
I could also tell you about John. John seemed nice enough. He sent me his questions, I sent him mine. It was the same old routine. But then he switched things up and sent me an eHarmony email. Normally I rejected guys right away when they asked me to do those kinds of things, but there was something about John that made me willing to experiment. The email was nice too. He said he didn't really like all the weird eHarm questions and he just wanted to talk. Then he asked for my phone number.
Now, that was just too much for a nice girl like me. I may answer any guy's questions, but I still have some limits. There are some things I just won't do. So, I emailed him back and told him I was still kind of new to all this and that I'd rather we just emailed. He wrote back and told me he totally understood. What a relief! Then he asked for my screen name.
Red. Flag.
If we've barely started getting to know each other and you're already incapable of listening to what I'm saying, that does not bode well for our future relationship. You should at least pretend to listen at first. Humor me.
I could tell you more stories, but I'll spare you. The moral of these stories is, I'm taking a little break from eHarm. But don't worry. The experiment isn't over -- I've still got two weeks to go. I just need to regroup. De-slut. You know.
There's a section in everyone's eHarm profile where you can write a little paragraph about the last interesting book you read. I'm currently reading "Chastened" by Hephzibah Anderson, a true story about a 30-year-old single writer who goes one year without having sex.
I'm thinking of adding that to my profile.
Love,
Tara
10:01 PM Love your smile...
I'm turning into a slut. Seriously. I'm sorry to be crass, but I'm not sure how else to put it. I am a big eHarmony slut.
My tale is not an unusual one. I started as a naive, young girl who turned to the Internet to... well, to what? Find true love? Appease her curiosity? We'll never know for sure what prompted me to sign on to eHarmony that fateful night, but I did it, and now I can hardly recognize the woman I've become.
At first I didn't want to talk to anyone on eHarm. These men would send me their '5-Questions,' and I would ignore them. But slowly, I started to answer. If a guy looked nice (or normal) I would answer their multiple-choice questions. What's the harm? I thought to myself. I didn't know what I was getting myself into.
Because once you start turning tricks, er, I mean, answering questions, it's hard to stop. I liked the attention and I wanted more. I stopped discriminating so much. Pretty much if you were a guy and you asked me your 5-Questions I would answer. I had no limits. I was out of control.
Oh, the shame! It is only now, looking back, that I can see the error of my ways. The only way I feel I can make this right is by sharing some of the lessons I have learned. But will that be enough? I just don't know...
I could tell you about Stephen. Stephen seemed nice enough. He was tall, good-looking. He was a chef in New York City. He seemed to have a lot going for him. And he was a smooth-talker, that Stephen. He sent me his 5-Questions, and I answered. Then he sent me an Icebreaker. I didn't know what an Icebreaker was, but I learned a lot from Stephen. It was an eHarmony message that read, "Love your smile." Well, that got me smitten. Give a gal a compliment and that'll get you pretty far. It wasn't until we took things to the next stage, the "Must Haves/Can't Stands" stage that I noticed the red flag.
The "Must Haves/Can't Stands" stage is when you go through a list of attributes that eHarm puts together and you check off ten that your ideal partner must have and ten that they must not. "Must Haves" include everything from "Confidence" to "Good Hygiene" whereas "Can't Stands" are like "Racial Intolerance" and "Addictions" (imagine having to pick which one you "can't stand" more...). Well, after that Icebreaker I got bold and sent Stephen my lists. I was in too deep, playing fast and loose. There was no saving me now.
The red flag came when I received Stephen's list and saw that as his first choice for his "Must Haves" he had selected "Sexually Knowledgeable." The description for this attribute reads, "I must have someone who is mature and experienced as a potential sexual partner and is able to express himself/herself freely."
Now, don't get me wrong, sexual expression is all well and good but would I call myself "mature" and "experienced"?! Do I want to be with a guy who needs that?? Or is willing to put that on paper as one of the top ten things he MUST have??!? He could have chosen "Kind" or "Affectionate" or even "Passionate," but he had to go and choose "Sexually Knowledgeable."
Red. Flag.
But how could this be? Things with Stephen were going so well. And he did send me that sweet Icebreaker, after all. I went back to read the Icebreaker for reassurance. That's when I realized... he hadn't written that Icebreaker at all. He had merely selected it from a list of options eHarm gave him. There it was: "Love your smile" right between "Want to chat?" and "I think we have a lot in common." I was devastated.
I could also tell you about John. John seemed nice enough. He sent me his questions, I sent him mine. It was the same old routine. But then he switched things up and sent me an eHarmony email. Normally I rejected guys right away when they asked me to do those kinds of things, but there was something about John that made me willing to experiment. The email was nice too. He said he didn't really like all the weird eHarm questions and he just wanted to talk. Then he asked for my phone number.
Now, that was just too much for a nice girl like me. I may answer any guy's questions, but I still have some limits. There are some things I just won't do. So, I emailed him back and told him I was still kind of new to all this and that I'd rather we just emailed. He wrote back and told me he totally understood. What a relief! Then he asked for my screen name.
Red. Flag.
If we've barely started getting to know each other and you're already incapable of listening to what I'm saying, that does not bode well for our future relationship. You should at least pretend to listen at first. Humor me.
I could tell you more stories, but I'll spare you. The moral of these stories is, I'm taking a little break from eHarm. But don't worry. The experiment isn't over -- I've still got two weeks to go. I just need to regroup. De-slut. You know.
There's a section in everyone's eHarm profile where you can write a little paragraph about the last interesting book you read. I'm currently reading "Chastened" by Hephzibah Anderson, a true story about a 30-year-old single writer who goes one year without having sex.
I'm thinking of adding that to my profile.
Love,
Tara
Monday, November 1, 2010
"If you keep shouting like that, you'll get big muscles all over your face."
Monday, November 1, 2010
8:53 PM Restore Sanity!
This weekend I was lucky enough to get to go to the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear in Washington DC. While I never felt insane (so I guess the rally did its job), I did experience a number of other emotions during my 24 hours in the D to the C. To help me bullet-point the weekend, I'll be using the assistance of Plutchik and his Wheel of Emotions.
Joy ...when the rally began!
Trust ...when a cab driver rescued me when I was lost in the outskirts of DC.
Fear ...when I was lost in DC and thought I was going to miss the after-party!
Surprise ...when I ran into Grandma, Leo, Robbi and Co. outside of The Old Ebbitt Grill.
Sadness ...when dinner was over on Saturday night.
Disgust ...when I saw a FOX News truck.
Anger ...when I was lost in DC and hadn't peed in like nine hours.
Anticipation ...another rally next year?!?!
Love,
Tara
8:53 PM Restore Sanity!
Joy ...when the rally began!
Trust ...when a cab driver rescued me when I was lost in the outskirts of DC.
Fear ...when I was lost in DC and thought I was going to miss the after-party!
Surprise ...when I ran into Grandma, Leo, Robbi and Co. outside of The Old Ebbitt Grill.
Sadness ...when dinner was over on Saturday night.
Disgust ...when I saw a FOX News truck.
Anger ...when I was lost in DC and hadn't peed in like nine hours.
Anticipation ...another rally next year?!?!
Love,
Tara
Monday, October 25, 2010
e-HOOOOOLY Crap!
Monday, October 25, 2010
8:40 pm Make it stop!
Okay, I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but this e-Harm thing is out of control. Apparently I'm compatible with every man in the tri-state area AND THEY WON'T STOP TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH ME. NOW, I understand how e-Harm works -- it's a sheer numbers game! If they tell you you're compatible with 25 guys a day, you're bound to get along with someone. No one would reject that many men for days and days. I know what the evil people at e-Harm are thinking: Eventually she'll cave...
It's legitimately giving me anxiety (shocker). I wake up in the morning and I've got at least 10 new emails from e-Harm telling me about all the guys who have sent me five questions. This is the first step in the e-Harm "getting-to-know-you" process. If you find someone with a profile that's appealing (read: they have an attractive photo), you can choose five questions from a long list to send to that person. If that person isn't totally skeeved out by you, they respond and send their five questions. The list is of entirely multiple choice questions. Examples include "How often do you work out in a week?" to hypotheticals like "If you were in a relationship and your partner took you to a party where you knew no one, what would you do?" Answers to that one are like "I would stick close to my partner and let him/her introduce me" or "I would strike out on my own and meet people" or "I would ask to skip the party."
So, over the past few days everyone and their brother has been sending me the five question thing. At first I was hesitant, but at my mom's encouragement, I started to respond. At the very least, this whole thing has really made me think about how I am in a relationship and what is important to me in a "partner." God, I hate that word.
But of course, there are always the creepers. E-Harm gives you an option to skip all the normal communication steps and just go straight to emailing or chatting online. To do this, the interested party (the creeper) sends a note saying they want to initiate contact or whatever. Then the innocent party (me), has to accept or decline. If you accept, you have to first read a letter from e-Harm about online safety so these dudes can't find you and you don't end up in a ditch after being raped and murdered. Comforting, no?
So far two guys have sent me such requests and I think my intial reaction was to scream "Oh, HELL no!" and slam my computer shut. Then I called my mom.
My mom is a whole other part of this e-Harm experiment. She's way more interested in this than I am, so I gave her my sign-on so she can pre-screen my prospects. I see no problem with this. It's kind of like a throw-back to the olden days when parents would pick your suitors. She's definitely more lenient and forgiving than I am ("Mom, he's 23 and balding..."), but maybe I need a little more of that.
In conclusion, I'm sticking with the e-Harm experiment, even though it gives me anxiety, because I paid for it and it really does force me to think about what I'm really after. If the thought of signing on to my e-Harmony account really makes me nauseous, maybe that's a sign. Maybe I'm not ready for a relationship. Or maybe I'm just not ready to risk it with crazies online.
Only time will tell. I've got three and a half weeks to go...
Love,
Tara
8:40 pm Make it stop!
Okay, I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but this e-Harm thing is out of control. Apparently I'm compatible with every man in the tri-state area AND THEY WON'T STOP TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH ME. NOW, I understand how e-Harm works -- it's a sheer numbers game! If they tell you you're compatible with 25 guys a day, you're bound to get along with someone. No one would reject that many men for days and days. I know what the evil people at e-Harm are thinking: Eventually she'll cave...
It's legitimately giving me anxiety (shocker). I wake up in the morning and I've got at least 10 new emails from e-Harm telling me about all the guys who have sent me five questions. This is the first step in the e-Harm "getting-to-know-you" process. If you find someone with a profile that's appealing (read: they have an attractive photo), you can choose five questions from a long list to send to that person. If that person isn't totally skeeved out by you, they respond and send their five questions. The list is of entirely multiple choice questions. Examples include "How often do you work out in a week?" to hypotheticals like "If you were in a relationship and your partner took you to a party where you knew no one, what would you do?" Answers to that one are like "I would stick close to my partner and let him/her introduce me" or "I would strike out on my own and meet people" or "I would ask to skip the party."
So, over the past few days everyone and their brother has been sending me the five question thing. At first I was hesitant, but at my mom's encouragement, I started to respond. At the very least, this whole thing has really made me think about how I am in a relationship and what is important to me in a "partner." God, I hate that word.
But of course, there are always the creepers. E-Harm gives you an option to skip all the normal communication steps and just go straight to emailing or chatting online. To do this, the interested party (the creeper) sends a note saying they want to initiate contact or whatever. Then the innocent party (me), has to accept or decline. If you accept, you have to first read a letter from e-Harm about online safety so these dudes can't find you and you don't end up in a ditch after being raped and murdered. Comforting, no?
So far two guys have sent me such requests and I think my intial reaction was to scream "Oh, HELL no!" and slam my computer shut. Then I called my mom.
My mom is a whole other part of this e-Harm experiment. She's way more interested in this than I am, so I gave her my sign-on so she can pre-screen my prospects. I see no problem with this. It's kind of like a throw-back to the olden days when parents would pick your suitors. She's definitely more lenient and forgiving than I am ("Mom, he's 23 and balding..."), but maybe I need a little more of that.
In conclusion, I'm sticking with the e-Harm experiment, even though it gives me anxiety, because I paid for it and it really does force me to think about what I'm really after. If the thought of signing on to my e-Harmony account really makes me nauseous, maybe that's a sign. Maybe I'm not ready for a relationship. Or maybe I'm just not ready to risk it with crazies online.
Only time will tell. I've got three and a half weeks to go...
Love,
Tara
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Photo Not Approved.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
10:47 PM Judge for yourself.
Tonight I joined eHarmony.
No, but really, I did.
I came home from work, got half-way out of my work clothes (I was too tired to finish), climbed into bed, ate some chips for dinner, drank a beer and joined eHarmony.
It wasn't like there was an event that sparked my desire to join. I wish I could tell you some inspirational story about how a higher power spoke to me and I suddenly knew my destiny was with eHarm. It was more like I was lying on my bed in front of the tv, trying to balance my empty beer bottle on my stomach when I stopped, picked up the computer, and typed in eHarmony.com, for no reason at all.
I mean, I kind of surprised myself. Ever since moving to New York, I've fully embraced my single lifestyle. I haven't really even been dating much -- mostly just reading and not cleaning my room and only shaving my legs when they start to itch. I was single and SO not looking to mingle. Until today.
So, whatever. I join. They ask me a thousand questions and then they ask for money. When I got to the money page, I started to have doubts (a year for $20 a month? Did it really take that long?? How would I feel about this come say, July???), so I texted my wise friend Arianna to tell her what I was doing. I believe I likened the whole thing to jumping off of a cliff. So, of course, she didn't respond. But I knew she wouldn't respond because she has to get up for work every morning at 3:30 AM, and I knew she'd be asleep already. Thus, I took her lack of response as silent approval and powered on. It's good to have friends who support you.
But then I had more doubts, so I called my mom and she got super excited and started looking up eHarmony coupons online for me to use. Then she put my dad on the phone and he asked me if I was shopping for a boyfriend online. And this all happened after I had listed "friends and family" as two of the top three things I'm thankful for on my eHarm profile. Figures.
So, I just do it. One month. Whatever. $60 down the drain. I'm feeling weird about the whole thing, but then...wait! Seven matches. SEVEN MATCHES. The love of my life was less than seven clicks away! I immediately started clicking on the profiles of these "highly compatible" men.
Aaaaand it took about 3 seconds for me to dismiss them all.
Five out of the seven had names I could not pronounce and profiles with some very broken English. The two profiles I was able to read contained words like "free-spirited" and phrases like "I like spending time with babies." I'm not exaggerating.
So, I'm feeling a little disappointed, now out 60 bucks and being told I'm most compatible with what I'm pretty sure was a middle-aged illegal immigrant, when I get an email from eHarm. Another match, perhaps?! Lucky number 8??
No. The email from eHarm was to inform me that the photo I had selected for my profile was not approved based on their "rules regarding attire." READ: Tara, if you don't stop dressing like a slut, even WE won't be able to find you a good man.
Now this was really just too much to take, so I signed off, photo-less, and went to take a shower (read: drown myself).
It was in the shower, as I carefully shaved off a week of armpit hair growth (again, not exaggerating), that a quote came to mind, as they often do when I'm feeling pensive. The quote was from a sticker that my wise, currently-sleeping friend Arianna had once found, taken a photo of, and posted on Facebook. It reads like a song lyric, or a line from a contemporary poem, or, perhaps, the title of my future memoir:
There is no sex in the city.
Love,
Tara
Saturday, October 9, 2010
The Sound of Settling
Saturday, October 9, 2010
10:18 am Bah Bah!
After tonight's SNL, I will no longer be a page. Earlier this week I was offered a job, and I accepted, and I'm starting on Monday. So, as you can imagine, all of this news and change has come with about fifteen hundred different emotions that I'm dealing with. At first I wrote that last sentence as "...that I'm struggling to deal with," but then I went back and deleted it because I'm not struggling. I'm dealing. It's just weird.
First of all, I'm really happy. I'm excited about my new job. It's in a department I love, and this job gets me further along on a career path I really think I want to be on. There's a lot of opportunity to grow and gain experience and blah blah blah. And there are the added perks that I didn't really think of until after I had accepted -- not being a page means I get my weekends back! I get WHOLE weekends just...OFF! What do you people do with that kind of free time?? I can't even imagine it. And the pay! Obviously you shouldn't take a job solely for the money, but after eight and a half months of living in NYC on $10/hr, I can't even tell you just how much making more money will mean to me. Over the past few months my Excel budget has been in rough shape - lots of red and negative numbers - and it's really been stressing me out! My increased income will certainly improve my quality of life.
But OF COURSE I can't be totally happy. I wouldn't be me if I was completely, blissfully happy and at peace. Sooo, there are the mixed feelings. I'm going to miss being a page! Obviously I knew this would all come to an end eventually (within a year, for sure), but it's still sad. I feel like I'm graduating all over again - you work hard, knowing there's an inevitable ending, but when it happens it's still really weird and sad and disorienting. And then there's the finality of it all! Just typing that out I realize how ridiculous I sound - I'm 23 and starting a new job - there's pretty much nothing final about my situation...but it feels final. Like, this is it. This is your job. Forever. I realize that's ridiculous, but that feeling is still there no matter how many times I tell myself I'm being ridiculous. When you accept a new job or a new apartment or a new relationship, you're accepting the good AND the bad. There are things about my job and my apartment (have I mentioned this roach problem?) and my relationships that stress me out and drive me crazy. And I'm agreeing to deal with that for the forseeable future. And if, in the forseeable future, I get stressed out and frustrated at my job and my living situation and my relationships here, I have no one to blame but myself. Because by taking this job, I've agreed to DEAL with it.
This whole situation - the great feelings I have about succeeding in the page program and getting a job and having the wonderful experiences that I've had AND the sort of sad, mixed up feelings I have about leaving pagedom and going forward into the professional world makes me think of one of my favorite songs. (Has anyone else noticed that I associate a song with pretty much every situation in my life? Is this normal? Do other people do this?)
"The Sound of Settling" by Death Cab is in my top ten favorite songs of all time. And the thing I love the most about it, is it can be interpreted in two ways. When you listen to the song, you can choose to think of "settling" as giving up on the dream and lowering your standards and accepting the cards you were dealt. When you think of it that way, it's sort of a sad song. But you can also choose to think of "settling" as finding your place. Fitting in. Clicking. In fact, I think of the way an old house creaks and groans as it "settles" at night. I think of a line from 'Magnolia': This happens. This is something that happens. When you think of it that way, it's sort of a happy song.
Listen for yourself and decide. Is it happy or sad? I think it's kind of up to you.
Then again, I think maybe that's the way life works too.
Love,
Tara
10:18 am Bah Bah!
After tonight's SNL, I will no longer be a page. Earlier this week I was offered a job, and I accepted, and I'm starting on Monday. So, as you can imagine, all of this news and change has come with about fifteen hundred different emotions that I'm dealing with. At first I wrote that last sentence as "...that I'm struggling to deal with," but then I went back and deleted it because I'm not struggling. I'm dealing. It's just weird.
First of all, I'm really happy. I'm excited about my new job. It's in a department I love, and this job gets me further along on a career path I really think I want to be on. There's a lot of opportunity to grow and gain experience and blah blah blah. And there are the added perks that I didn't really think of until after I had accepted -- not being a page means I get my weekends back! I get WHOLE weekends just...OFF! What do you people do with that kind of free time?? I can't even imagine it. And the pay! Obviously you shouldn't take a job solely for the money, but after eight and a half months of living in NYC on $10/hr, I can't even tell you just how much making more money will mean to me. Over the past few months my Excel budget has been in rough shape - lots of red and negative numbers - and it's really been stressing me out! My increased income will certainly improve my quality of life.
But OF COURSE I can't be totally happy. I wouldn't be me if I was completely, blissfully happy and at peace. Sooo, there are the mixed feelings. I'm going to miss being a page! Obviously I knew this would all come to an end eventually (within a year, for sure), but it's still sad. I feel like I'm graduating all over again - you work hard, knowing there's an inevitable ending, but when it happens it's still really weird and sad and disorienting. And then there's the finality of it all! Just typing that out I realize how ridiculous I sound - I'm 23 and starting a new job - there's pretty much nothing final about my situation...but it feels final. Like, this is it. This is your job. Forever. I realize that's ridiculous, but that feeling is still there no matter how many times I tell myself I'm being ridiculous. When you accept a new job or a new apartment or a new relationship, you're accepting the good AND the bad. There are things about my job and my apartment (have I mentioned this roach problem?) and my relationships that stress me out and drive me crazy. And I'm agreeing to deal with that for the forseeable future. And if, in the forseeable future, I get stressed out and frustrated at my job and my living situation and my relationships here, I have no one to blame but myself. Because by taking this job, I've agreed to DEAL with it.
This whole situation - the great feelings I have about succeeding in the page program and getting a job and having the wonderful experiences that I've had AND the sort of sad, mixed up feelings I have about leaving pagedom and going forward into the professional world makes me think of one of my favorite songs. (Has anyone else noticed that I associate a song with pretty much every situation in my life? Is this normal? Do other people do this?)
"The Sound of Settling" by Death Cab is in my top ten favorite songs of all time. And the thing I love the most about it, is it can be interpreted in two ways. When you listen to the song, you can choose to think of "settling" as giving up on the dream and lowering your standards and accepting the cards you were dealt. When you think of it that way, it's sort of a sad song. But you can also choose to think of "settling" as finding your place. Fitting in. Clicking. In fact, I think of the way an old house creaks and groans as it "settles" at night. I think of a line from 'Magnolia': This happens. This is something that happens. When you think of it that way, it's sort of a happy song.
Listen for yourself and decide. Is it happy or sad? I think it's kind of up to you.
Then again, I think maybe that's the way life works too.
Love,
Tara
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Forever Young.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
5:18 PM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1nbvplgElw
Last night was the season premiere of SNL, and it was one of the most unforgettable experiences of my life. I was on assignment backstage, meaning I was literally in the midst of all the craziness, and in-studio for the actual show. It was truly incredible and something I will never forget.
But I'll also never forget the way it felt to dance for hours and hours at the after, after party with my friends. Or the way I laughed so hard it hurt again and again. Or the heat of all of us on the dance floor. Or the spinning of the flashing lights. Or the way it felt to push open the doors of the UCB and step outside into daylight at 7 in the morning. This picture captures a few moments later - after we had stepped, bleary-eyed and disoriented, into the new day. It was the moment after we had all looked at each other and burst out laughing at the incredibility of it all - at the luck of our lives. We are young and happy and excited. We have shared unique experiences that few others will ever fully understand.
This picture captures us basking in the light of our youth. I hope we never forget what it feels like to be so full of possibility.
Love,
Tara
5:18 PM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1nbvplgElw
But I'll also never forget the way it felt to dance for hours and hours at the after, after party with my friends. Or the way I laughed so hard it hurt again and again. Or the heat of all of us on the dance floor. Or the spinning of the flashing lights. Or the way it felt to push open the doors of the UCB and step outside into daylight at 7 in the morning. This picture captures a few moments later - after we had stepped, bleary-eyed and disoriented, into the new day. It was the moment after we had all looked at each other and burst out laughing at the incredibility of it all - at the luck of our lives. We are young and happy and excited. We have shared unique experiences that few others will ever fully understand.
This picture captures us basking in the light of our youth. I hope we never forget what it feels like to be so full of possibility.
Love,
Tara
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Hello, New Theme Song
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
9:33 PM Exactly.
I believe that the world should revolve around me.
Love,
T
9:33 PM Exactly.
I believe that the world should revolve around me.
Love,
T
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Parasailing
Sunday, September 12, 2010
9:00 PM Writing exercise.
Once we had completely ascended into the air, our feet kicking freely, we shared a comfortable silence, breathing in the humid air and looking down on the world.
“I was thinking,” she began, not quite looking at me, “that while we’re up here you should just yell out everything you hate about him. Just, like, get it all out up here where no one can hear you.”
The idea kind of shocked me. I’d been wanting to cry all day and found it especially hard to hold back my tears now. I coughed uncomfortably as a giant, painful lump formed in my throat.
“I don’t know,” I said, shakily. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Okay,” she shrugged, now looking at me. “You don’t have to say anything.”
I wanted to yell, but I didn’t want to cry in front of her. I didn’t want to spend these precious few moments I had flying above Hawaii with my sister thinking about him. I didn’t want yet another moment of my life to be about him.
I must have thought about this longer than I realized, because suddenly there was a jerk on the rope and I felt us being pulled lower towards the boat.
Now I really wanted to cry, realizing I’d spent all that time in the air thinking about not thinking about him. But I surprised myself and did what felt completely unnatural - I laughed.
It sounded strange – a forced, wheezy exhalation. A croak. It reminded me of the sounds I used to make after an asthma attack.
But I did it again. And again. And again, until it sounded like real laughter. Soon, I was smiling and giggling uncontrollably, kicking my legs as I was reeled into safety, my sister beside me, watching and laughing too.
Love,
Tara
9:00 PM Writing exercise.
Once we had completely ascended into the air, our feet kicking freely, we shared a comfortable silence, breathing in the humid air and looking down on the world.
“I was thinking,” she began, not quite looking at me, “that while we’re up here you should just yell out everything you hate about him. Just, like, get it all out up here where no one can hear you.”
The idea kind of shocked me. I’d been wanting to cry all day and found it especially hard to hold back my tears now. I coughed uncomfortably as a giant, painful lump formed in my throat.
“I don’t know,” I said, shakily. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Okay,” she shrugged, now looking at me. “You don’t have to say anything.”
I wanted to yell, but I didn’t want to cry in front of her. I didn’t want to spend these precious few moments I had flying above Hawaii with my sister thinking about him. I didn’t want yet another moment of my life to be about him.
I must have thought about this longer than I realized, because suddenly there was a jerk on the rope and I felt us being pulled lower towards the boat.
Now I really wanted to cry, realizing I’d spent all that time in the air thinking about not thinking about him. But I surprised myself and did what felt completely unnatural - I laughed.
It sounded strange – a forced, wheezy exhalation. A croak. It reminded me of the sounds I used to make after an asthma attack.
But I did it again. And again. And again, until it sounded like real laughter. Soon, I was smiling and giggling uncontrollably, kicking my legs as I was reeled into safety, my sister beside me, watching and laughing too.
Love,
Tara
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
A Day, er, Night in the Life
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
8:46 pm Hmmm...
I'm at a loss for words... so I'm going to tell you about my day. I'm making a concerted effort to start writing again, but at the end of a long, stressful day at work it's pretty much the last thing in the world I feel like doing. That and going to the gym. And I'm already not going to the gym, so I feel like I should accomplish something today... even if my current mental state (tired, cranky) is not one that fosters creativity.
You sure you want to keep reading?
Okay, so today I woke up to the chimes of my cell phone alarm clock at 6:30, drenched in sweat. I was drenched in sweat because I had decided to go the night without using my air conditioner. Labor Day has passed, my electricity bills have been rather high, and it was supposed to drop down to around 78 degrees...Who needs an air conditioner when all I need to do is crack a window? I thought to myself.
I do. Me. This girl needs an air conditioner.
Anyone who has been to my apartment (all 5 of you) will tell you that my apartment is always a good fifteen degrees warmer than it is outside. The reason behind this isn't clear, but it's GREAT in the winter -- always toasty warm. It becomes more of an issue in the summer. And it became more of an issue last night as I lay in bed, willing the cool 78 degree breeze from outside to rush through my open window and over me...
But alas, nothing.
I was determined, though. In the middle of the night, somehow, through my heat-induced delirium I remembered...I had a fan somewhere! That would do the trick! Sweating and swearing I stumbled out of bed and fumbled around in the darkness until I found it. That sweet black Honeywell was too good to be true!
Indeed.
I plugged it in, angled it toward me, and fell onto my bed, ready for sleep. But fans just push around air. And if there's only hot air, they just push around hot air. That's just good science. And, in addition to not helping, all that hot air moving was blowing my hair around until it got stuck in the sweat dripping down my face and neck. Lovely.
So, now it's early, early morning and in-between falling in and out of consciousness (I'm not sure if I slept or got dehydrated and passed out) I tie my hair on top of my head and try to sleep that way. But then I've got all these wispys that are flying around my head and getting stuck in my sweat and then breaking loose and getting stuck again, so yet again I'm stumbling around my room, now blindly jabbing bobby pins into my head. Eventually I give up and wrap a blanket around my head like a turban. I'll give you a moment to ponder that visual.
And I did all of this until 6:30 this morning when my cell phone alarm clock began to chime and I thought to myself, Why, God? Why?
And, instead of the usual silence, a voice (and again, this may have been a symptom of the delirium), laughed and said, Dude, you did that to yourself.
And as I sit here, in my room with my air conditioning on, it occurs to me that last night probably says a lot about me.
I am reminded of a saying:
Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?
Because it feels so good when I stop.
Love,
Tara
8:46 pm Hmmm...
I'm at a loss for words... so I'm going to tell you about my day. I'm making a concerted effort to start writing again, but at the end of a long, stressful day at work it's pretty much the last thing in the world I feel like doing. That and going to the gym. And I'm already not going to the gym, so I feel like I should accomplish something today... even if my current mental state (tired, cranky) is not one that fosters creativity.
You sure you want to keep reading?
Okay, so today I woke up to the chimes of my cell phone alarm clock at 6:30, drenched in sweat. I was drenched in sweat because I had decided to go the night without using my air conditioner. Labor Day has passed, my electricity bills have been rather high, and it was supposed to drop down to around 78 degrees...Who needs an air conditioner when all I need to do is crack a window? I thought to myself.
I do. Me. This girl needs an air conditioner.
Anyone who has been to my apartment (all 5 of you) will tell you that my apartment is always a good fifteen degrees warmer than it is outside. The reason behind this isn't clear, but it's GREAT in the winter -- always toasty warm. It becomes more of an issue in the summer. And it became more of an issue last night as I lay in bed, willing the cool 78 degree breeze from outside to rush through my open window and over me...
But alas, nothing.
I was determined, though. In the middle of the night, somehow, through my heat-induced delirium I remembered...I had a fan somewhere! That would do the trick! Sweating and swearing I stumbled out of bed and fumbled around in the darkness until I found it. That sweet black Honeywell was too good to be true!
Indeed.
I plugged it in, angled it toward me, and fell onto my bed, ready for sleep. But fans just push around air. And if there's only hot air, they just push around hot air. That's just good science. And, in addition to not helping, all that hot air moving was blowing my hair around until it got stuck in the sweat dripping down my face and neck. Lovely.
So, now it's early, early morning and in-between falling in and out of consciousness (I'm not sure if I slept or got dehydrated and passed out) I tie my hair on top of my head and try to sleep that way. But then I've got all these wispys that are flying around my head and getting stuck in my sweat and then breaking loose and getting stuck again, so yet again I'm stumbling around my room, now blindly jabbing bobby pins into my head. Eventually I give up and wrap a blanket around my head like a turban. I'll give you a moment to ponder that visual.
And I did all of this until 6:30 this morning when my cell phone alarm clock began to chime and I thought to myself, Why, God? Why?
And, instead of the usual silence, a voice (and again, this may have been a symptom of the delirium), laughed and said, Dude, you did that to yourself.
And as I sit here, in my room with my air conditioning on, it occurs to me that last night probably says a lot about me.
I am reminded of a saying:
Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?
Because it feels so good when I stop.
Love,
Tara
Sunday, September 5, 2010
I Won't Grow Up!
Sunday, Sept. 5, 2010
9:51 AM 'Cause growing up is awfuller than all the awful things there ever were!
I'm messing up the lyrics to some 'Peter Pan' song because THIS is how I feel right now. Not unlike a wave that almost killed me that one time in Hawaii, I feel like Adulthood has knocked me over, dunked me underwater, tossed me around and left me crawling on the ground and gasping for air.
As I sit here typing this post in my big sunny kitchen in G while sipping on a glass of orange juice I did not pay for, I realize this may be an exaggeration, but seriously... I feel like I've been struck with/surrounded by a lot of "Adult" problems lately. I gots issues.
First of all, Kaitlyn is in college now. Not really my issue; more of a "my baby sister is growing up" sort of thing, but I'm having a surprisingly hard time watching her go through it all. I worry about her ALL THE TIME. She was at a party last night, and I had to resist the urge to text her to make sure she had her hand over her drink and that she wasn't going to walk home alone. During the week, I text her constantly to make sure she's eaten or that she got to class on time or just to make sure she's okay. Her first week of college has brought back all these traumatic freshman year memories for me and as a result I'm becoming a HELICOPTER PARENT. The whole family went to visit her yesterday, and as we were going to leave I wanted to yell, "Okay, I think we've all gone along with 'playing college' long enough. It's time to take her home for her nap." I have half a mind to go to grad school at UCONN just so I can be close by if she needs me. I'm not kidding.
So, basically I've decided I'm suffering from empty-nest syndrome, which is a very Adult (albeit CRAZY) problem to have. That's issue number one. The rest of the issues don't require a whole lot of explanation, so I'm just going to lay them out there: my electricity may be shut off September 10, I have a collection agency leaving voicemails on my cell phone, one of my friends just found out she's pregnant and another friend just found out a close family member has cancer.
...
Okay, maybe some of those require some explanation. The electricity being shut off is related to a meter issue that involves my landlord and the electricity company, but nonetheless, we (me and my roommate) somehow owe money we didn't know we owed and are now delinquent, blah, blah blah, they're threatening to shut off our power. Fantastic.
The calls from the collection agency I ignored for days because I thought it was some kind of scam until I looked up the phone number and realized it was, in fact, a collection agency. I went to the emergency room back in January and never received a bill. My guess is that's what they're calling about, but it's super annoying because, once again, I NEVER RECEIVED A BILL and I wasn't asked to pay at the time and I'm afraid this is screwing up my credit. I don't even KNOW what credit IS, but I KNOW it needs to be GOOD. FML.
And the other two issues I'm not going to explain because they're pretty terrifyingly obvious.
All of this is really starting to stress me out so, for the rest of this holiday weekend, I'm taking a break from Adulthood. And now I'm going to go shower in my childhood bathroom and get dressed in my childhood bedroom and let my mom take me and Steph shopping. And later, I'm going to go have dinner at my grandma's and then go see some of my old, high school friends.
I want a break!
Clearly, I'm too young to grow up.
Love,
Tara
9:51 AM 'Cause growing up is awfuller than all the awful things there ever were!
I'm messing up the lyrics to some 'Peter Pan' song because THIS is how I feel right now. Not unlike a wave that almost killed me that one time in Hawaii, I feel like Adulthood has knocked me over, dunked me underwater, tossed me around and left me crawling on the ground and gasping for air.
As I sit here typing this post in my big sunny kitchen in G while sipping on a glass of orange juice I did not pay for, I realize this may be an exaggeration, but seriously... I feel like I've been struck with/surrounded by a lot of "Adult" problems lately. I gots issues.
First of all, Kaitlyn is in college now. Not really my issue; more of a "my baby sister is growing up" sort of thing, but I'm having a surprisingly hard time watching her go through it all. I worry about her ALL THE TIME. She was at a party last night, and I had to resist the urge to text her to make sure she had her hand over her drink and that she wasn't going to walk home alone. During the week, I text her constantly to make sure she's eaten or that she got to class on time or just to make sure she's okay. Her first week of college has brought back all these traumatic freshman year memories for me and as a result I'm becoming a HELICOPTER PARENT. The whole family went to visit her yesterday, and as we were going to leave I wanted to yell, "Okay, I think we've all gone along with 'playing college' long enough. It's time to take her home for her nap." I have half a mind to go to grad school at UCONN just so I can be close by if she needs me. I'm not kidding.
So, basically I've decided I'm suffering from empty-nest syndrome, which is a very Adult (albeit CRAZY) problem to have. That's issue number one. The rest of the issues don't require a whole lot of explanation, so I'm just going to lay them out there: my electricity may be shut off September 10, I have a collection agency leaving voicemails on my cell phone, one of my friends just found out she's pregnant and another friend just found out a close family member has cancer.
...
Okay, maybe some of those require some explanation. The electricity being shut off is related to a meter issue that involves my landlord and the electricity company, but nonetheless, we (me and my roommate) somehow owe money we didn't know we owed and are now delinquent, blah, blah blah, they're threatening to shut off our power. Fantastic.
The calls from the collection agency I ignored for days because I thought it was some kind of scam until I looked up the phone number and realized it was, in fact, a collection agency. I went to the emergency room back in January and never received a bill. My guess is that's what they're calling about, but it's super annoying because, once again, I NEVER RECEIVED A BILL and I wasn't asked to pay at the time and I'm afraid this is screwing up my credit. I don't even KNOW what credit IS, but I KNOW it needs to be GOOD. FML.
And the other two issues I'm not going to explain because they're pretty terrifyingly obvious.
All of this is really starting to stress me out so, for the rest of this holiday weekend, I'm taking a break from Adulthood. And now I'm going to go shower in my childhood bathroom and get dressed in my childhood bedroom and let my mom take me and Steph shopping. And later, I'm going to go have dinner at my grandma's and then go see some of my old, high school friends.
I want a break!
Clearly, I'm too young to grow up.
Love,
Tara
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Conversations with My Sister
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
11:34 PM Home is wherever I'm with you.
via BBM (that's Blackberry Messenger for the slow and/or old):
T: I want to love that Edward Sharpe song. I almost put it on the mix I made you. But I hate the part in the middle when they talk about her jumping out the window and bleeding everywhere. It ruins it for me.
T: Maybe I'm not hipster enough
K: Hahahah I think it's cute when he says he was falling in love with her! It's okay though. Being hipster isn't that fun. You have to act like you don't care all the time.
K: And ya know what?! Sometimes I do!
T: Hahaha you are wise beyond your years Little Gman
K: Thank you...Big Gman.
Love,
Tara
11:34 PM Home is wherever I'm with you.
via BBM (that's Blackberry Messenger for the slow and/or old):
T: I want to love that Edward Sharpe song. I almost put it on the mix I made you. But I hate the part in the middle when they talk about her jumping out the window and bleeding everywhere. It ruins it for me.
T: Maybe I'm not hipster enough
K: Hahahah I think it's cute when he says he was falling in love with her! It's okay though. Being hipster isn't that fun. You have to act like you don't care all the time.
K: And ya know what?! Sometimes I do!
T: Hahaha you are wise beyond your years Little Gman
K: Thank you...Big Gman.
Love,
Tara
Monday, August 23, 2010
What is it about us?
Monday, August 23, 2010
9:33 PM Must read.
In case you haven't seen it yet, there was a really interesting piece on "twenty-somethings" in the New York Times' Magazine last weekend. It's pretty long, but I gotta say... I feel like it explained a lot. It made me feel better!
Let me know what you think...
Love,
Tara
9:33 PM Must read.
In case you haven't seen it yet, there was a really interesting piece on "twenty-somethings" in the New York Times' Magazine last weekend. It's pretty long, but I gotta say... I feel like it explained a lot. It made me feel better!
Let me know what you think...
Love,
Tara
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Enough Said.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
8:19 PM Whoa.
"I have a history of making decisions very quickly about men. I have always fallen in love fast and without measuring risks. I have a tendency not only to see the best in everyone, but to assume that everyone is emotionally capable of reaching his highest potential. I have fallen in love more times than I care to count with the highest potential of a man, rather than with the man himself, and I have hung on to the relationship for a long time (sometimes far too long) waiting for the man to ascend to his own greatness. Many times in romance I have been a victim of my own optimism." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
Love,
Tara
8:19 PM Whoa.
"I have a history of making decisions very quickly about men. I have always fallen in love fast and without measuring risks. I have a tendency not only to see the best in everyone, but to assume that everyone is emotionally capable of reaching his highest potential. I have fallen in love more times than I care to count with the highest potential of a man, rather than with the man himself, and I have hung on to the relationship for a long time (sometimes far too long) waiting for the man to ascend to his own greatness. Many times in romance I have been a victim of my own optimism." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
Love,
Tara
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