I Won't Grow Up!

Sunday, Sept. 5, 2010
9:51 AM  'Cause growing up is awfuller than all the awful things there ever were!

I'm messing up the lyrics to some 'Peter Pan' song because THIS is how I feel right now.  Not unlike a wave that almost killed me that one time in Hawaii, I feel like Adulthood has knocked me over, dunked me underwater, tossed me around and left me crawling on the ground and gasping for air.

As I sit here typing this post in my big sunny kitchen in G while sipping on a glass of orange juice I did not pay for, I realize this may be an exaggeration, but seriously... I feel like I've been struck with/surrounded by a lot of "Adult" problems lately.  I gots issues.

First of all, Kaitlyn is in college now.  Not really my issue; more of a "my baby sister is growing up" sort of thing, but I'm having a surprisingly hard time watching her go through it all.  I worry about her ALL THE TIME.  She was at a party last night, and I had to resist the urge to text her to make sure she had her hand over her drink and that she wasn't going to walk home alone.  During the week, I text her constantly to make sure she's eaten or that she got to class on time or just to make sure she's okay.  Her first week of college has brought back all these traumatic freshman year memories for me and as a result I'm becoming a HELICOPTER PARENT. The whole family went to visit her yesterday, and as we were going to leave I wanted to yell, "Okay, I think we've all gone along with 'playing college' long enough.  It's time to take her home for her nap." I have half a mind to go to grad school at UCONN just so I can be close by if she needs me.  I'm not kidding.

So, basically I've decided I'm suffering from empty-nest syndrome, which is a very Adult (albeit CRAZY) problem to have.  That's issue number one.  The rest of the issues don't require a whole lot of explanation, so I'm just going to lay them out there: my electricity may be shut off September 10, I have a collection agency leaving voicemails on my cell phone, one of my friends just found out she's pregnant and another friend just found out a close family member has cancer.

...

Okay, maybe some of those require some explanation.  The electricity being shut off is related to a meter issue that involves my landlord and the electricity company, but nonetheless, we (me and my roommate) somehow owe money we didn't know we owed and are now delinquent, blah, blah blah, they're threatening to shut off our power.  Fantastic.

The calls from the collection agency I ignored for days because I thought it was some kind of scam until I looked up the phone number and realized it was, in fact, a collection agency.  I went to the emergency room back in January and never received a bill.  My guess is that's what they're calling about, but it's super annoying because, once again, I NEVER RECEIVED A BILL and I wasn't asked to pay at the time and I'm afraid this is screwing up my credit.  I don't even KNOW what credit IS, but I KNOW it needs to be GOOD.  FML.

And the other two issues I'm not going to explain because they're pretty terrifyingly obvious.

All of this is really starting to stress me out so, for the rest of this holiday weekend, I'm taking a break from Adulthood.  And now I'm going to go shower in my childhood bathroom and get dressed in my childhood bedroom and let my mom take me and Steph shopping.  And later, I'm going to go have dinner at my grandma's and then go see some of my old, high school friends.

I want a break!

Clearly, I'm too young to grow up.

Love,
Tara